Barbie is a Muse in our Patriarchal World - Part THREE

Putting it all together…

In Part ONE I shared how Barbie represents a rather contradictory idea, one that can be divisive, and how cis het white men benefit the most from this division.

In Part TWO, I explored what we can (continue to) do collectively to keep moving the needle forward. I share how I healed my lack mentality and why I identify as Sustainable Barbie. I also shared a concept that has helped along my journey towards showing up as my next level self, in hopes that it will help you too!

Here in Part THREE, I am sharing my perspective on how this is playing out for the greater collective.

Film stills of Margo Robbie as Barbie shown in various outfits side by side with the actual Barbie doll

First, some notable movie ‘logistics’

The 2023 Barbie movie was directed by Greta Gerwig. Greta is the daughter of a software engineer and actress, initially known for working on mumblecore films. Side note: while I have watched none of these films prior to writing this, after watching the trailers I can relate to all of them in some way. This lead to her producing some more memorable (empowering female) titles of our current time: Frances Ha, Lady Bird, Little Women, White Noise.

With Barbie, she took things as far as she could in many areas…

Barbie was played by Australian Actor and Producer Margo Robbie, who I can only describe (aesthetically speaking) as an absolutely stunning bombshell. She has classic girl next door good looks (as originally defined by Barbie in the 50s) with a modern edge. Robbie is known for her role as Harley Quinn in the 2016 film Suicide Squad, appealing to many fans who prefer entertainment that sits just outside of core mainstream. Casting Margo as Barbie is both perfection and clever as it cast a net to an incredibly wide audience, crossing countries, genders, and societal differences. She also fit the description of Barbie perfectly, with her edginess making her the perfect Barbie for today’s modern twist on an old narrative.

They played the Barbie character somewhat ‘safe’. I can only assume this is because it is how we recognize Barbie, but also, there was most likely heavy contractual agreements made to be able to use the Barbie IP. Officially the highest grossing film in Warner Brothers’ history, topping the Harry Potter franchise and so much more, Barbie clearly hit a nerve. Why?

It exposed the patriarchy in a rather clever (and funny) way.

It is worth noting that Barbie won ONE of the 8 awards it was nominated for. It won for Best Original Song “What Was I made For?” by Billie Eilish. The song itself speaks to the perpetuating narrative women experience today. The timeliness of this movie is both a beacon of hope and a warning bell. It spreads the message that if Barbie can get out of her box, you can too.

Margo Robbie displays a breadth of talent in Barbie, Bombshell, Suicide Squad and I,Tonya

The unattainable standard perpetuated by patriarchy

Barbie and the narrative she perpetuates (amongst young women especially) is that you need to look perfect like her. Barbie sets the standard and it’s an incredibly high, largely impossible standard to meet. The epitome of perfection by American beauty standards, which is often looked to as the golden standard from cultures around the world. Not only have women been raised being fed with this message for generations, it has been weaponized… conditioning women to believe they need to look and be like Barbie, as perfect as possible.

This keeps women busy chasing the dream, spending time and hard earned money to look perfectly manicured, all in an attempt to appease the male gaze. It keeps women caught in a cycle of thinking and believing they are not good enough, unless they look and act a certain way, while playing into the very systemic issues we are faced with today. While Barbie needed to be cast with someone like Robbie, the choice of someone with that extra bit of edge to her was certainly not made by mistake. It could be a subtle way of showing women how to dare to be different, or it could be playing right into the need to maintain optics and stay safe. Maybe it’s a bit of both.

Adding insult to injury: the pink tax!

As a child of the 80s I was raised with the ‘pink is for girls and blue is for boys’ mentality. It wasn’t ‘normal’ for me as a girl to like blue and that just felt… unfair. As an adult, now I know why. Capitalistic predators will always want to make the most of any financial opportunity, at the expense of the collective.

Marketing and merchandising teams have been in cahoots to make Cap’s bottom line bigger since the creation of the economy. Products marketed specifically towards women tend to be more expensive than the exact same product marketed towards men. Add that women need to buy more products to take care of their bodies and it means that Cap makes more money from the people who get paid the least. This is a lose lose situation for women, designed by the mad men at the top to keep women from becoming too empowered. *Cap = capitalism.

This is one example of how capitalism has been built from fear, and by numbing our greater sense of humanity.

FUN FACT: They built the whole film set, so the actors got to actually act in Barbieland. That’s super cool! It’s the complete opposite of working with a green screen and CGI. There are pros and cons to both.

The basic colour psychology of PINK

When we look at the colour pink through the lens of positive and negative psychological associations, we find the following:

POSITIVE: Feminine, romance, affection, sweetness, softness, tenderness, kindness, thoughtfulness, insightful, intuitive, reassuring, hope, calming, caring, nurturing, compassionate, understanding, joyful, playful, vibrant, youth, health, warmth, euphoric, refreshing, creative, love.

NEGATIVE: Childish, inexperience, naiveté, immature, silly, ‘girlish’, lack of will power, lack of self reliance, lack of self worth, overly emotional, overly cautious, physical weakness, needy, unreal expectations.

This creates an interesting dichotomy worth examining further. Pink is perceived as reassuring and hopeful, while also being perceived as ‘lacking’ and unrealistic. Given that pink is used in marketing to target women, this could easily leave women wondering what they were made for. What does the stark contrast between the positive and negative psychology of pink say to you about women, society, and capitalism?

How (white) women have been conditioned to respond in the face of uncertainty

On the larger cultural stage, PERFORMATIVE ALLYSHIP plays out with white women trying to look good while holding on to what they know. As a white woman myself I have a unique perspective to understand where this comes from. It is a barrier of it’s own and is baked right into the patriarchy model of oppression. The need for security, protection and survival are underlying it all, with a lot of women hiding completely. Over the past several years, this performative response to oppression has been playing out on repeat, from BLM protests to pink pussy hats and blue bracelets. The intention may be pure of heart but the thought behind it has yet to be fully realized.

Performative allyship is a symptom of the bigger issue at play.

I can say with almost certainty that no woman has ever felt safe one hundred percent of the time, and when your safety is at risk so is your ability to fully show up. I know this from first hand experience, when my heart wanted to attend local indigenous protests but my body was still recovering from surgery. As women, we are often raised to be martyr’s, and I was learning how to give up that plight.

These gendered conditionings are intertwined through social narratives and heard from birth. Do good but don’t expect to succeed, be kind but stay safe cause you are weak. Through these narratives, women are taught to stay in their place, accommodate others and sacrifice themselves. While men are taught to toughen up, be strong and don’t give up. With the rise in popularity of gender binary trends such as ‘trad wife’, ‘cottagecore’, and the resurgence of gender reveal parties, we are not seeing progress towards true equality as quickly as we can. Instead, humanity is holding onto some outdated nostalgic ideal that never truly existed, while patriarchal systems run on automatic because we are stuck in the box. Given the societal conditional, systemic roadblocks and survival instincts, it takes a tonne of courage to step outta the box. Give yourself grace.

That said, sometimes we need to show up scared and do it anyway.

Healing in a Barbie world is…messy

From my perspective, the messiness is exactly why most people don’t take the time to truly look at and heal their wounded parts. Staying safe by following the status quo is easier and more acceptable, with far less challenges to face. Messiness is judged, often by ourselves more than others, and our fear of judgement is often what keeps us ‘in line’. Personally, I can’t live that life, the one where we stay in line to avoid judgement and hide from ourselves, but I understand why so many choose it.

While Gerwig managed to carve her own niche, the default measure of a woman’s value to society is based on outside appearances. With women being kept busy idealizing the unattainable standard of ‘perfection’, it is easy for things like self critique, self doubt and shame to come creeping in. It can be incredibly difficult for even the most well meaning man to understand just how difficult it can be for a woman to speak up for herself, it is simply not safe. In such a world, women are easily driven to comparison mode to feel better about themselves, and can default to tearing each other down to stay as close to the ‘top’ as possible. Add in martyrdom and the need to appease, and it is much easier to fade away than it is to speak up for one self, let alone stand up for the collective.

How do we heal the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine when most of humanity is stuck living in this perpetual state of being…?

To keep moving the needle forward, break out of the box and put your own ‘suit’ on first. The clothing we wear plays a big part in our healing journey. It can bring us back to our values, the outfits we put together can be full of symbolism and meaning, and the psychology of colour brings a whole other element worth exploring. Our clothing has the ability to remind us of who we are, where we come from and what matters most to us, and it is something we put on our bodies every single day. As one of the most accessible forms of self expression, it is worth taking the time to play with how we are showing up through what we wear.

Your healing is bigger than you.

One could say we are collectively failing our sisters from another mister, yet there are pockets of hope and loads of promise for a better future. Realizing that future requires a more united front, one with the collective picture and a much bigger purpose. It requires looking up then looking within, introspection with perspective. Breaking out of the survival box requires strength, perseverance and taking many leaps of faith along the way. It requires recognizing, overcoming and letting go of feelings of shame, guilt and imposter syndrome. This is the journey that all women must face in order to change the narrative. With healing being a perpetual journey back to self, how we fashion that journey is up to each and every one of us.

Come on Barbie, let’s go Party!

Step Outta the Box and Into Your Style!

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